Story of a friendship: Ten Years of Diabetes and Me

"HAPPY NEW YEAR". When I hear these words, I think of what will happen in the year ahead-what will I accomplish, which places I go to, and what friends I will make. 2016's New Year''s Eve brought an unexpected friend. A sneaky, picky, and quite demanding friend. But above all, a loyal one. He promised me to stay with me forever. And so far, he has never left me, not even for a minute. Who is that bestie of yours, how and where did you meet? you might ask. Well his name is Type 1 Diabetes- T1D for short. He is secretive about his background, but he told me he has two siblings (Type 2 and gestational diabetes). We met at the hospital, in a place called ICU. As for how we met, he might be able to tell you more because I have no memory of it. Living with T1D is not easy, and is sometimes scary. It is a life laden with risks, restrictions, and with potential consequences if his needs are not met.

It is common sense that when a guest is at home, they get priority. My friend friend literally took over my life. He got to choose what I eat, drink, when to go back home, or what to do or not. The most annoying of all is how picky he is. He can't tolerate rice, candies, chocolate, Fantas, or anything that contains sugar. In a matter of weeks my menu dwindled to a couple of items. On the food side: bananas and amaranth. On the drink side: water and milk. As if this wasn't bad enough, he imposed on me Insulin. He said that as long as he was with me, I had to take it. No need to say that I wasn't thrilled about it. But he threatened me to send me back to the hospital if I don't take it. The hardest thing with Insulin is to calculate the right dose. The dose can vary depending on physical activities, food intake, and factors like stress and diseases. If I don't take enough, I would be having a lot of meetings in the bathroom; and if I take too much I would feel tired as if I'd been running a marathon with a cow on my shoulders.

Being a very picky and demanding friend, T1D brought my social life to a near halt. The limited scope of food and drinks I could consume made social outings feel like minefields. At birthday parties, there was nothing I could eat, and at picnics the only thing I could eat were peanuts and water. Events that I attended, like family gatherings, felt to me like emotional torture. Saying No to a slice of cake or passing a bowl of rice without a scoop requires more willpower than people would think. The thought of me sitting in a gathering sipping nothing other than water, to which we should add the tight schedule for my Insulin injections (I had to be at home by 7PM), made me decline most invitations I received. 

T1D social restrictions did not stop at parties only, it expanded to my abilities to travel and spend vacations away from home. For me to travel, we had to find a household that could provide for my diet, and had a fridge for my Insulin. And as it turned out, not may families I knew could do both at the same time, especially if they are in an upcountry or rural area. Results of this? While my friends explored new places, I explored new levels of boredom at home. 

Living with such an overbearing friend like Diabetes is a challenge no one could face alone. That's why anyone who has ever crossed paths with Diabetes should have professionals to help them manage their relationship with Diabetes. Though they do their best, diabetes's psychological and emotional toll is often overlooked. Personally, the first months were brutal. I remember crying at the thought that I would never eat candies again, and feeling an overwhelming sense of fear and powerlessness after a glucose test turned up a 12.5 mmol/l(almost twice the normal value) despite a strict adherence to my diet. The low availability of medical professionals and the regular shortages of some of my medical supplies in my country (Burundi) added a lot of anxiety for me and my family. All of these, added to the social restrictions of diabetes, created a loneliness bubble that I wasn't able to escape until very recently.

It's been almost 10 years since Diabetes and I became bodymates. Though he hasn't changed a bit, I have learned to live with him. I am no longer who saw candies like Uranium. I better understand my condition: what it requires of me and what my limits are. Diabetes and I are now on better terms. Today, I can say that I am happy, free of shame, and proud of the life I have been able to build within the constraints of living with Diabetes.

Nothing of this would have been possible without the love and the support of those who have been with me all along. My parents who sacrificed so much for me, sharing the best and worst with me; my high school teachers who, despite being the first diabetic student at school, did everything to ensure that I wouldn't fall behind after a long period of hospitalization and accompanied me during a very hard time of adaptation to the disease; and the Tujenge scholars community (especially its administration, and Simon and Bosco- the cooks) that, by providing me with an adequate diet, made my attendance at the program seamless and eased my first long-time stay away form home (probably one of the most stressful moments in my life).

And to all those who- through their prayers, kind words and actions- helped me, you have contributed to building a healthier and more confident person. And for that I am forever grateful.

                                                                                                        

                                                                                                       Written by Guy Tresor Karikera